Wednesday, May 20, 2009

Ways my education has failed me...


ok, this is NOT a rant about my YM education in any way. i actually value my YM training at OHCC and various YS events. what this IS, is a fun little post for all youth pastors to post various names of classes that were not required in formal YM training that may have come in handy. if you add one or two, have fun with it and give a good description of the class and if you're really ambitous write a short story/reference as to why this particular class would be useful.

here's my list thus far:

1. Graphic Design 301 - After completing GD 101 & 204, you will expand your design skills beyond the clip/word art tools within various word processors. You will take your paintbucket/paintbrush skills that you learned from MS Paint and better develop them into a higher quality GD program such as Photoshop or GIMP. (we all know where this one comes from...you can't have crap advertisements and believe that kids can't tell the difference between your ad that looks like the clip art monster threw up on it and the church down the road that has a graphic designer as a YM volunteer. you need to represent, son!)

2. Computer Science 204 - Required for those working in churches with an average congregant age >40. This class is to teach you the in's and out's of word processing format tools, email configuration, hardware and software installation, and local area network layout. if you take this class with an emphasis in sound technology (which is required if the average age of your church congregant is >50) you will learn the in's and out's of sound boards, sound mixing, microphone set up, and room acoustics. (Let's face it you ARE the youngest person employed by the church by at least 20 years. You are the only one on staff that grew up with technology and are thus deemed as the "go-to" guy/gal concerning all things technology.)

3. Party Planning 105 - This class is a supplement to Event Planning 102. in PP105 you will learn how to plan, advertise, and execute a party with minimal ministry impact and which is also commonly referred to as, "something nice to do for them..." Everything from meal planning, RSVP accumulating, party execution, and efficient clean-up strategies will be covered.

4. Vending Machine Maintenance and Repair 203 - VMMR203 will teach you the tools you need to know to maintain and repair a vending machine. It will teach you how to de-jam the coin slot using less than desirable tools, efficient loading strategies, and how to keep that ol' can-machine-that-the-pop-company-has-forgotten-about running to maximize said machine's lifespan.

5. MMA Rules and Regulations 101 - MMARR101 will teach you the rules, regulations, and how to identify/execute various submission holds. It will teach you dangerous sharp edges/corners to keep an eye out for during an impromptu match. And will also introduce you to various MMA/UFC fighters so you can be relevant to your UFCer youth.

that's just a few...what classes do you wish YOU had?

-kage

2 comments:

Brittney said...

Thanks for the comments Kyle! Sam had to explain the "Cat Club" joke to me.... I've never seen Fight Club!!


This was a funny post. :)

Betsy said...

Oh that's hilarious. I agree!!!!!

Church Marketing 202: CM202... After learning the basics like pink walls don't attract men in the congregation, and signs like "We take in sinners!" don't attract much of anybody... Consider diving into learning about how to best present your church and your faith to the community without pissing them off. Control your presentation and how to get everyone else on board. HA Good luck.

Ministry Review 101: MR101, learn how to put together instructions for the NEXT youth pastor, intern, or person to take over when you are ill. A manual so that the ministry does not depend upon YOU but can continue w/o you. Also learn how to build up others to do your work so it's not a one man show.

Wow... these all would have been nice. Thanks for the post Kyle!